A Delta Support Call Story....

Me: Thank you for calling Delta Tech Support, my name is Mike, How can I help You?
Delta Manager: Help me put my computer back together. I have no clue how to do it.
Me: Put it...Back together? How so?
Delta Manager: Well...This is our manager computer, and we had a huge party last night, at a bar down the street from the location, after work. I being the Designated Driver accidentally left my keys back at the location and had to go get them. While I was getting my keys out of the back room, someone thought it would be funny to take the managers computer apart and hide pieces of it all over the Car wash.
Me: I see...Do you have all of the pieces gathered.
Delta Manager: I think so...The people that hid them eventually went and got them all and laid them out in the wash booth.
Me: Ok, and they're still outside?
Delta Manager: Yes.
Me: Ok, I need you to go collect them, bring them inside and lay them out on a flat surface. The carouse office desk would be best.
Delta Manager: Ok, give me a minute. I'll have to go and get some towels first.
Me: Towels? Why towels?
Delta Manager: Because all of the pieces are wet. If I'm going to bring them inside I have to dry them off first. Should I use a blow dryer instead?
Me: Can I put you on hold for just one second?
Delta Manager: Sure, no problem.
(I laugh my @ss off with my IT buddies next to me...Then my manager comes in, I tell him the call outline so far...After a few laughs with him he tells me to take a record of the rest of the call)
Me: Ok, sorry about that...A blow dryer would be a lot better than a towel, much less of a chance of static electricity. (as if it matters at this point)
Delta Manager: Ok, I'll need to go get one and go outside.
Me: If you don't mind me asking...Why exactly are the computer parts wet?
Delta Manager: Well...It's a long story.
Me: I have time...Please explain.
Delta Manager: Well...After I yelled at the guys to go get the parts and put the computer back together. They went and got them, laid them out in the wash booth and covered all of the parts with Soap from the wash...Then left.
Me: ....
Delta Manager: So I got the water hose and tried to rinse them off before the Soap got all dried and set in. Was the right thing to do right?
Me: ...Well...Not exactly. Given the circumstances though, I don't think you did not do any more damage than was already done. You do know that even if you get this PC back together, there is very little chance of it working, at least reliably, don't you?
Delta Manager: No, why is that?
Me: (going into a big lecture on the fact that 1.)Parts laying in a yard, 2.)Parts being covered in Soap and 3.) Parts doused in water = no worky)
Delta Manager: Oh no! So what do I do?!
Me: Well...At this point I'm going to have to talk with my manager and see where we go from here. Very good possibility that the computer will need replaced and cost will be taken out of someone's paycheck
Delta Manager: Oh crap...Ok, thanks.
(Go sit in my managers cube for a few minutes just to make it look good...Tell him about the call, my manger says to take it out of his pay.)
Me: Ok, I'm back, and unfortunately, the computer will need to be paid for out of your paycheck.
Delta Manager: Oh crap...What am I going to do?!?!
Me: Well, I'm not sure. Just try and explain this to someone your District manager, give names of the people who did it, and tell them that you at least put effort into fixing the problem. I'll put your name in our call logs that you weren't at fault.
Delta Manager: Ok, thanks man...Sorry to waste your time.
Me: No problem...I would suggest that you go ahead and dry those parts off, go get a box and put them all in one place for the District manager.
Delta Manager: Ok, will do. Man I'm not drinking again...Especially with those @*#holes.